A Pointer or Two

Had a visit at my temporary desk at the Independent from the nonagenarian bowls correspondent, Bill Lush, delivering his column On The Jack. A former journalist and, apparently, many other things besides, it's always a pleasure to see him.

He sat down in the spare, grubby chair and asked me if I'd ever tried bowls. I said, no, and that I'd just taken up surfing. He looked very serious. "Mmmmm," he said, propping his chin on his walking stick. "Given any thought to White Pointers?" These, of course, are sharks and Bill then regaled me with his many shark experiences from when he lived in Tasmania.

In the game-fishing anecdotes, the sharks came off worse but he also told me about the scientist studying seals he took out to a colony in his boat. She ignored his warnings about local sharks and insisted on donning diving gear and going over the side. He brought the boat back alone. His thesis is that anyone, surfer or diver, who goes in the water looking remotely like a seal should expect to be eaten. "It's not the sharks' fault," he said. "And they always spit you out when they realise they've made a mistake. Anyway, if you change your mind about bowls, come down the club and have a roll sometime."